Forced to Slow Down

I am always going 90 to nothing.

My day doesn’t start as early as most people but I also work a lot later than most people.

I teach piano and voice  privately and currently I have 43 students. In the hours that I am not actually conducting lessons, I am preparing for lessons, studying, and doing my own piano practice and then just normal book work that comes from running your own business.

I love what I do, but I have to tell you, I load a lot of pressure on myself to do and be the best I can be–with this comes a certain amount of fatigue and anxiety. I am sure you gathered from my last post that I am a perfectionist.

As I write to you now I have been forced to slow down and take it easy. I have come down with some kind of upper respiratory infection. I had to cancel students yesterday and today, and I had to just take a break and lay on the couch. This is really hard for me to do. I think about all that I need to do and all the make-up lessons I have to give. I have a really hard time just resting. In the  middle of my attempts to rest today, you know really quiet my mind,  I remembered “OH!! ITS THURSDAY! I have to write my blog! I committed to Thursdays!!”

Well folks I don’t have a great blog for you this week, all I know is these are the moments that I realize I am not invincible. So with this sickness I was forced to lay it low and not keep pressing through. I literally couldn’t. Why is it so hard for me to just rest? My busy mind gets me in trouble sometimes. I wrote a blog not that long ago about “being still.” This is one of the hardest things for me to do. I have such an overactive mind. I do believe I am learning through these experiences. God is working it all of it for His good, even in the midst of my neurosis.

A verse I always rely on is, Mathew 11:28-30

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

We need rest, but I think it’s not just physical rest, it’s mental and spiritual rest too. The mental rest is what I am trying to learn.

I know this– I know who my savior is. My soul rests in that truth! There’s no question or denying that one.

Blessings and rest to you all!

Now I am going to go eat some soup and curl up on the couch.

Johanna

 

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9 thoughts on “Forced to Slow Down

    • Thanks for the comment……Well you are right about that, and at some point I probably will have less than that. I am blessed that my business has grown like that and for the most part I am healthy and still young enough to do that. I do have to beware and take care of myself though. My post sure wasn’t whining….hope it didn’t come off that way. Through it all, I depend on God to renew me daily and I am trying to watch my daily choices. This I am learning to navigate.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Jo, I think our Lord wants you to rest, relax and rely. Rest with Him because you are tired. Relax in Him because you are tense. Rely on Him because he is working all things in accordance with His will. Love you, Uncle Dave

    Liked by 2 people

  2. How beautiful that you are so loved, Johanna. I’m sorry you aren’t well. They are correct. Try not to work too hard. (hugs) Now, go back to bed! lol 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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